6 Signs He Doesn’t Want a Relationship with You
Every woman desires to be genuinely loved and cared for by her man. That’s why it matters for a woman in a romantic relationship to decipher and interpret every move their fiancé makes. Although it hurts to realize that the person you love doesn’t plan to be in a serious relationship, it’s better than being taken for a ride for years.
If you aren’t sure if your man is serious about the relationship, this article helps you understand the signs he doesn’t want a relationship with you.
Why Does He Keep Me Around If He Doesn’t Want a Relationship?
Your guy may be telling you how much he loves you, but deep down you know he’s not into the relationship and he’s just stringing you along.
While sweet words are important in a romantic relationship, they mean little if they aren’t matched with actions. You’ll be left wondering why he keeps you if he doesn’t want a serious relationship with you. Here are some of the reasons why he acts this way.
1. He Fears Loneliness
Humans are social beings and have a very strong desire to belong to a pair. Therefore, loneliness isn’t a comfortable place for anyone. That’s why your guy will keep you around knowing very well that he doesn’t intend to get into a serious relationship with you.
He knows you’re readily available for him whenever he feels lonely. As long as there’s no one else to fill the void, he’ll always want to have you around. Perhaps it’s the same reason that keeps you there even though his actions clearly show you that he’s not into you.
2. He’s Insecure
An insecure person has a hard time making serious decisions. So, if your guy doesn’t want to let you go even though his actions say he doesn’t want to get into a serious relationship with you, it could mean that he is insecure. Indecisiveness is one of the main signs of insecurity.
He keeps you hanging around because he’s not sure if you are the right choice. He will string you along until he finds someone else who seems like a better choice than you. It also means that he doesn’t know exactly what he wants in a woman and is afraid of not being good enough for you.
A guy who’s confident and secure knows what he wants and doesn’t need a lot of time to figure out if should continue with the relationship. He’s more definitive in his decision and dares to follow through.
3. He Enjoys the Sex
Just because he tells you how much he enjoys having sex with you doesn’t mean he wants a serious relationship. So, if his behavior shows that he is not ready to get into a serious relationship with you, yet he doesn’t want to let you go, it could very well imply that he’s keeping you for sex.
Unfortunately, for most guys, sex is just a need that has to be fulfilled at every opportunity.
4. He Has Formed a Habit
It’s interesting to note that relationships create habits for us. Therefore, if you enjoy spending the weekend together watching the latest blockbusters on Netflix or going for strolls in the city, he might not want to let you go just yet. The more time you spend together, the more it becomes a habit.
So, when you aren’t together he becomes lonely. That’s why he’ll tell you that he enjoys spending time with you even though he doesn’t want to be in a serious relationship. He finds it difficult to break that habit.
5. He’s Keeping His Opportunities Open
It’s normal for a guy to keep many women hanging as he tries to figure out what’s good for him. So, your guy could be hanging out with you as he looks for another woman who matches his ideal fiancé. He’s keeping his choices open just in case his ideal woman doesn’t come along. The moment he finds what he’s looking for, he will vanish vapor.
6 Signs He Doesn’t Want a Relationship with You
It’s quite painful to be with someone who doesn’t take your relationship seriously. You’ll be left wondering what you aren’t doing right. Sadly, you’ll continue to stress yourself over someone who’s not into you. If you are tired of being snubbed, these signs will let you know if he truly doesn’t want a serious relationship with you. If you want to know more, you can also check the related article on Cupid’s Light.
1. He Doesn’t Make Long-Term Plans
When a guy is seriously into you, he will involve you in his long-term plans because he sees a future with you. For example, he will talk about what kind of a family he wants to have, including the number of kids and the schools he would like to take them to. He will also involve you in his career and business plans by seeking your advice.
So, if your guy doesn’t involve you in his plans, he just doesn’t envision a future with you. He won’t commit to any long-term plans with you. In most cases, he will quickly change the subject or get offended when you bring this topic up.
2. You Don’t Know His Friends
Have you met his friends or does he keep giving you excuses? If a guy wants a serious relationship with you, he’ll find time to introduce you to his friends, relatives, and anyone else who’s important in his life. Aside from letting you know his friends, he’ll also want to see how you relate with them, especially if he hopes to spend the rest of his life with you.
If he’s not really into you, he will always find an excuse not to introduce you to the important people in his life. Basically, he’s trying to show you that you aren’t that important in his life. So, it’s time to let him go.
3. He’s Constantly Distracted
It’s normal for your man to appear distracted and distant, especially when he’s dealing with a stressful situation. But if he is always distracted when you are together, it could mean that he doesn’t take you seriously. He’s not paying enough attention to you because he doesn’t want to be in a serious relationship with you.
A guy who’s serious with you will give you his undivided attention. He will also take every word from your mouth seriously just to show you how much you matter to him.
4. He’s Untrustworthy
Romantic relationships are built on trust. When trust is gone, there’s nothing you can do to make the relationship work. A guy who is serious about the relationship will never give you a reason to doubt him. You’ll always know that you can count on him for any kind of support.
But if you guy is always erratic and untrustworthy, it could be a clear sign that he’s not into the relationship. For instance, he’ll always find reasons to pause or do away with plans with you. He will also fail to keep his word or honor his promises.
5. He’s Always Missing in Action
A guy who disappears for days without a word is a perfect example of a man who’s not interested in a serious relationship. Probably the guy has another woman on the side.
It’s okay for your man to take some time off, especially when he’s going through a difficult time, but if he disappears suddenly and remains missing in action without a word, it shows that he has other more important commitments.
6. He’s Never Available Emotionally
Your guy should give you undivided emotional support. You should be able to confide in him and open up to him about everything that’s disturbing your emotionally. He should also be free to open up to you. That’s how you’ll both build each other emotionally.
However, if your guy doesn’t want a serious relationship, he will always be emotionally unavailable. He will distance himself from you because he doesn’t want to invest his emotions and feelings in you. So, if he emotionally detaches from you and keeps you at bay, it’s time to distance yourself from him.
Signs He Likes You But Doesn’t Want a Relationship
Sometimes you’ll fall in love with a guy who likes you but doesn’t want to be in a serious relationship with you. This can be confusing, especially if you like him and want to make the relationship work. Sometimes it will be hard for you to realize that he’s not serious about the relationship. If you find yourself in this predicament, here are some of the signs to look for.
1. Texting Without Asking You Out
He will text or call you frequently without asking you out. Even if he goes around and asks you out, he’ll only go on one or two dates and then go back to texting you. This shows that he wants your attention and emotional support, but doesn’t want to commit himself to a real relationship.
2. Asking You Out Without a Solid Plan
He will text or call you frequently, and when he finally asks you out, he won’t have a clear plan of when, how, and where you should meet. He will just suggest the date in passing like, “we should hook up this weekend.” This clearly shows that he likes you but doesn’t want anything more from you.
3. He Doesn’t Define Your Relationship
If you’ve been seeing each other for several months and still he doesn’t want to define the relationship, that’s a perfect sign that he’s not ready to commit. A guy who likes you and is serious about the relationship wants to own you right away.
4. He’s On and Off
You can tell if a guy isn’t serious about the relationship if at one time he texts or calls you repeatedly and the next moment he’s completely silent. He will show a lot of interest and then pull back. This shows that he has intimacy issues, or he’s dating someone else.
5. Too Busy
It’s normal for a guy to be caught up with work and other commitments, but he shouldn’t be too busy to see you. If it’s the job that’s keeping him away, he will eventually find an opportunity to call or text you. But if he takes hours to reply to your text, it could be a sign that he’s not serious about your relationship.
How Do You Act When He Doesn’t Want a Relationship?
What do you do when a guy you’ve invested all your time and emotions in tells you that he’s not ready to get into a serious relationship with you? Where do you go from there? Here are some important steps to take.
1. Say You Understand
Just tell him that you understand and don’t say anything else. In most cases, the silence will prompt him to explain why he feels that way. There’s no need to argue with him or try to discount him or force him to take back the words.
Saying “I understand” makes him think you actually understand where he’s coming from, thus helping him to relax and explain his reasons.
2. Stop Having Sex with Him
If you’ve been having casual sex with him, cut it off immediately. Don’t be surprised to discover that he still wants to sleep with you. Make it clear to him that the next guy you want to have sex with is the guy who’s willing to commit to a serious relationship. This shows that you are a virtuous and principled woman.
3. Give Him Space
Don’t beg him to stay. It will only make you look desperate and weak. You shouldn’t even try to argue with him. Staying away from him for a while will give you time to heal and allow him to realize how important you are to him.